Canadians go for Gold....

Man if Aleks is a vag (ugh sounds like a disease) I am a full blown pussy.

First let me say that I tried that lovely speed work last week on Friday. It started out with me realizing in the changing room that I forgot to bring my underwear. And yes I wear underwear always, no matter what - end of conversation - my mother would be proud/relieved. Anyway I'm pumped and go to put on my gym clothes when lo and behold I am one article of clothing short. Should I puss out and go home (ya yayayayya screams my internal fat girl) no - says my desperate to be thin fat girl. I decide to wear what I wore during the day. So back on goes my Hello Kitty Brazilian cut cotton panties. Let me tell you Hello Kitty was not designed for that speed work out.

The first part of the run went fine I warmed up at a 10min/mile ran the 400 at speed, did the 800 at speed, completed the mile at speed. Between each I did a recovery400 at 10min/mile. Following the mile at speed I did the 800 at speed and the 400 at speed each with a recovery of 10min/mile. As I gear up for the last "speed" interval, a 1200m, I realize there is no fucking way this is going to happen. My arms are tingly and if I look up the room is a spinnin'. However I buckle down, up the speed and pray my legs will move fast enough so that I am not thrown off the damn treadmill. After 400 m I think I'm gonna die, contemplate the scene from Sandlot when he fakes his death so the life guard has to resuscitate him and imagine me falling off the treadmill and Carl having to give me mouth to mouth this almost keeps me going. However the vomit that floods the back of my mouth quickly erases that - thus ending the speed workout. I end the whole thing by walking a mile - slowly.

I have shame - serious shame for not being able to complete the speed workout.

And then Sunday comes. I'm feeling good, I've iced my fascia who were not pleased with my speed workout. I implore my husband to go on a ten mile run around my neighborhood, which is generally rolling but does have some hills. Now for those who have not seen my husband I will harken back to grade school when we learned the Greek mythos of Zeus and his Altantean Gods. John stands 6'3" is about 8% body fat on a bad day and used to be our university's decathlete. He gives in to my pleading but demures and says "I'll try to keep up I haven't been running in forever". About mile 5 I check my watch we're clockin' 9, sometimes sub 9 min/ miles and the whole time he's out ahead. Do you know what a pissed off Jewish girl looks like after 5 fast miles?...well if you were driving down Avondale you did. I stopped at mile 9, I literally couldn't go any farther. Oh and John ran it out for an additional 2 miles at the end, just for shits and giggles.

In summary this last week was pure hell. I reached deep inside for that extra push and basically my body gave me the finger in return. I'm thinking my body is sending me a message...wait if you're quite you can almost hear it...

"ALEKS IS PSYCHO DO NOT TRY TO BE A BEAUTIFUL -BUT CRAZY - POLISH GIRL"

I came to the following after some research:
The hippopotamus is a large gregarious mammal. There are estimates of their running speed varying from 30 km/h (18 mph) to 40 km/h (25 mph), or even 50 km/h (30 mph). The hippo can maintain these higher estimates for only a few hundred meters or yards.

Amen Sista.